Some said, “love is sweeter in a second time around”. Well, it seems so, but it was not the reason why I accepted Mike again to come in to my life. There are many things that I have to consider, and one is the sign that I had been asked from God. It is the thing I told God just between me and Him, to determine a man whom I could love and live the rest of my life.
As what I’ve mentioned on my first article titled,”How Love Finds Our Way”, Mike was married to another woman. And take note that was so painful and unbearable to me. But why I accepted him?
Just like what I’ve said also that even Mike married with another woman, I could not find myself angry and upset on him. Instead, all my understanding, empathy and love remains for him. Do not ask me why, and I could not explain either. Anyhow, it still not the reason why I accepted him.
About March, Mike filed a divorce to his wife, and at the same time trying to win my heart back. Of course, I never say yes to him right away. That was a hard time for me to think. That was actually a battle between my heart and mind. Should I follow my heart and be willing to be hurt again? Or should I be wise with my decision. Turn down Mike, and live peacefully? Or give him a chance? Never that I come into a rush decision. I should be wise this time, I told myself.
Added to that, I was in an eight years relationship. I don’t need to mention his name. But he knew that I was dedicated and committed to him. We were not just meant for each other anyhow for sure. Thanks for him that he was just understanding. I hope, he will find his true happiness someday, somehow.
Well, Mike sent me gifts and all, but these things still not give me enough reason to accept him yet. However, on the first or second week of April, I finally come into a decision to let Mike come in, and love him again. I got a clear message about the sign that I had asked God to give on me. I was so excited, and right away I have no hesitation to say, I love you, Mike. Maybe, because of that sign, and also the feelings that just hidden after so many years.
And so, we decided to get married after finally the divorce case was approved. Planning to get married was in a rush, but somehow in a perfect moment. Everyone was happy and excited since no one is expecting me to get married that soon. Everyone said, “oh, I never seen you having a date or heard that you have a boyfriend”, and I was just smiling back on them. It was really a great surprise from God.
As you can see on our wedding photos, you will notice a big smile from the people attended our wedding, and of course on me. No one ever imagine, but yeah we were so happy. No doubt. God bless us all. Until the next issue.
Monday, April 18, 2011
How Love Finds Our Way
(Love is stronger than death (Song of Solomon 8:6-7, I Corinthians 13- Love never fails)
Have you heard about a love story of Romeo and Juliet? We have our own version, only that we end up with joy. Romeo and Juliet is a tragic story. They both died because of their “Love”. But with our love, God is working in behalf of us, since circumstances are beyond our control.
When you are patient enough to wait the fulfillment of God’s plan in your life, you will definitely receive a rewarding surprise, according to your desire. It maybe sometimes take a long time before it happen but when it is given, everything turns out amazing. You can’t just realize it, until you are overwhelm with happiness.
I met my husband, Mike sometimes of September 2000 through a dating service. At first it was just a try or experimental. It never comes into my mind that it would become real or romantic. We exchanged emails, chat and phone calls every morning in my office. I was fallen in-love with a romantic guy, who is from the other side of the world. The scenario goes like that way. And I was floating in clouds with rainbow.
But one day, when everyone tries to against our happiness, my world was falling apart. Few of my friends that I considered friend are maybe getting jealous with the love we had, and that they made false story about me. And probably it affects our romance. That’s what I believed at first, but when Mike explains his part, the story is different all together. However, it was too late because he was married with other woman. I guess, I don’t need to mention her name in respect to her.
My world was shattered in that time he married. I was so hurt, but then I understand. There is no hatred or anger that I could find in my heart, except understanding for him. His wife sent pictures to me of their wedding, and even family pictures during those 10 years that they lived together. And I was sincerely happy for them. The pictures seemed to be telling me that they perfectly happy together. But that’s her side of the story.
However, when I chatted Mike sometimes of 2006, he told me about his life with his wife. I was hurt again because that is not what I wish to happen to him and Marcus, his son. What I ever wanted for them is to live with peace, contentment and happiness. Yet, that is life. You can’t ask everything. Anyway, I kept on praying for them, that the family will be getting well. I advise Mike to accept his wife as she is. Never did I pray that they would fall apart. But like I said before, when God has plan for you, He will definitely make it. Glad it is not too late for us.
As time went by, and I was just open for Mike, for whatever things he wanted to share with me. Giving him advise, greeting when there is occasion and all through out 10 years we never stop communicating each other. But it doesn’t mean that we play or make things that against God. We were just friends all over 10 years. His wife knew that because sometimes we also chatted. We were also friends anyway, until the beginning of January or February 2010.
Anyway, to make the story short. I accepted Mike again around March, and by April we decided to get married right after he got his divorce. I think there is no way anymore that his marriage will be saved. Some people knew why. And for sure, they could understand us.
Anyhow, we are now happy with our married life. Though we temporarily apart because of the laws and all, but someday soon, we could be together again. God united us. Made our dreams come true and just fulfilled our hearts desires. He knew what I’ve prayed, and God also knew what Mike prayed for too. We never have regreted whatever happened into our lives. Instead, it made our love stronger, and made our hearts more accepting and understanding to each other. We are both happy and we hope, people whom we both love can understand us also, accept us without hesitation and will just be happy for us.
Okay, guys thanks for reading. Wait for the other parts of our love life. God bless you all.
Have you heard about a love story of Romeo and Juliet? We have our own version, only that we end up with joy. Romeo and Juliet is a tragic story. They both died because of their “Love”. But with our love, God is working in behalf of us, since circumstances are beyond our control.
When you are patient enough to wait the fulfillment of God’s plan in your life, you will definitely receive a rewarding surprise, according to your desire. It maybe sometimes take a long time before it happen but when it is given, everything turns out amazing. You can’t just realize it, until you are overwhelm with happiness.
I met my husband, Mike sometimes of September 2000 through a dating service. At first it was just a try or experimental. It never comes into my mind that it would become real or romantic. We exchanged emails, chat and phone calls every morning in my office. I was fallen in-love with a romantic guy, who is from the other side of the world. The scenario goes like that way. And I was floating in clouds with rainbow.
But one day, when everyone tries to against our happiness, my world was falling apart. Few of my friends that I considered friend are maybe getting jealous with the love we had, and that they made false story about me. And probably it affects our romance. That’s what I believed at first, but when Mike explains his part, the story is different all together. However, it was too late because he was married with other woman. I guess, I don’t need to mention her name in respect to her.
My world was shattered in that time he married. I was so hurt, but then I understand. There is no hatred or anger that I could find in my heart, except understanding for him. His wife sent pictures to me of their wedding, and even family pictures during those 10 years that they lived together. And I was sincerely happy for them. The pictures seemed to be telling me that they perfectly happy together. But that’s her side of the story.
However, when I chatted Mike sometimes of 2006, he told me about his life with his wife. I was hurt again because that is not what I wish to happen to him and Marcus, his son. What I ever wanted for them is to live with peace, contentment and happiness. Yet, that is life. You can’t ask everything. Anyway, I kept on praying for them, that the family will be getting well. I advise Mike to accept his wife as she is. Never did I pray that they would fall apart. But like I said before, when God has plan for you, He will definitely make it. Glad it is not too late for us.
As time went by, and I was just open for Mike, for whatever things he wanted to share with me. Giving him advise, greeting when there is occasion and all through out 10 years we never stop communicating each other. But it doesn’t mean that we play or make things that against God. We were just friends all over 10 years. His wife knew that because sometimes we also chatted. We were also friends anyway, until the beginning of January or February 2010.
Anyway, to make the story short. I accepted Mike again around March, and by April we decided to get married right after he got his divorce. I think there is no way anymore that his marriage will be saved. Some people knew why. And for sure, they could understand us.
Anyhow, we are now happy with our married life. Though we temporarily apart because of the laws and all, but someday soon, we could be together again. God united us. Made our dreams come true and just fulfilled our hearts desires. He knew what I’ve prayed, and God also knew what Mike prayed for too. We never have regreted whatever happened into our lives. Instead, it made our love stronger, and made our hearts more accepting and understanding to each other. We are both happy and we hope, people whom we both love can understand us also, accept us without hesitation and will just be happy for us.
Okay, guys thanks for reading. Wait for the other parts of our love life. God bless you all.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Wreckage
Some people said, "all your fears are the creation of your doubtful mind, little faith and insecurities." Fear is only in the mind. But why it is so disturbing, painful and even make you cry? Who can understand your fear? Who will eliminate the undesirable feeling?
I've been with so many broken hearts. These made me feel so insecure every time I sense a threat. It is so tiring and disturbing. I know, no one could understand me. Many times, I've been confident to many people whom I thought I could trust with. Once, my whole month salary was taken because I let someone to get it for me. But it turns out that it will just loss like how the person I treated friend is gone. Once, I broke a friendship because of my confidence to the people whom I thought I could confide with. I lost the trust of the only person whom I considered a sister because of one person, I overly trusted, then it turns out to be like a sleeping snake. What else should I loss before I could be happy?
Fear. Why I am so afraid again? One of my friend told me about her pain over her husband having an appear with other woman. She cried to me all the pain. And I told her to divert her mind to some other things that can make her forget. Divert your mind. Wow! it is easy to say but it is very hard to do. Why it is hard for me to apply it to myself now? Where is the tough being I have? It is really easy to say than done. But I need to be strong. There are still many things awaiting ahead of me. I should not be fear.
Lord, I know you put this fear in my heart for a reason. Maybe I could not understand it right now, but I only give my trust in you. My sweet Jesus, please help me. Please heal my broken heart, and give me confidence again to laugh, to trust and to smile. I am so afraid Lord. Please give me strenght to face any challenge of my life. I am so afraid. Maybe, I have a little faith. Please forgive me. Take all the wreckage of bad memories that tried to make me restless and blue. I am so tired and I don't want to cry anymore. I am in a dept of sorrow and in the ocean of loneliness. I feel so alone. But if these things can help me to grow and over come the fear, please make me strong. I can do nothing without you. It's hard to be alone Lord, where no one could hear my sorrow. But I know, you are just there to listen my moaning. Please comfort me with your mercy and love. I could not stand it alone. I need you Jesus.
I know, in this new chapter of my life. There are more things that I could expect with; maybe of joy, or sadness, and or real smile which no fear hiding behind every giggle. Whatever, please prepare me so that I can endure it, until the very day that no more tears to flow because You wipe it. I also know that this fear inside me is a destroying thought. I should not cherish it, but I rather fight it.
In this world, I didn't find any person that I could share my fear and pain. For if I do sharing it, some would be hurt. And these very hard for me. However, having you God in my life is the most precious truth that made me smile in the midst of doubts and tears. You are my oasis of peace, love and confidence. I trust in you. I give my life to you. Whatever your purpose in my life, here I am Lord. I love you so much, and please help me to obey and trust to only you. Amen
I've been with so many broken hearts. These made me feel so insecure every time I sense a threat. It is so tiring and disturbing. I know, no one could understand me. Many times, I've been confident to many people whom I thought I could trust with. Once, my whole month salary was taken because I let someone to get it for me. But it turns out that it will just loss like how the person I treated friend is gone. Once, I broke a friendship because of my confidence to the people whom I thought I could confide with. I lost the trust of the only person whom I considered a sister because of one person, I overly trusted, then it turns out to be like a sleeping snake. What else should I loss before I could be happy?
Fear. Why I am so afraid again? One of my friend told me about her pain over her husband having an appear with other woman. She cried to me all the pain. And I told her to divert her mind to some other things that can make her forget. Divert your mind. Wow! it is easy to say but it is very hard to do. Why it is hard for me to apply it to myself now? Where is the tough being I have? It is really easy to say than done. But I need to be strong. There are still many things awaiting ahead of me. I should not be fear.
Lord, I know you put this fear in my heart for a reason. Maybe I could not understand it right now, but I only give my trust in you. My sweet Jesus, please help me. Please heal my broken heart, and give me confidence again to laugh, to trust and to smile. I am so afraid Lord. Please give me strenght to face any challenge of my life. I am so afraid. Maybe, I have a little faith. Please forgive me. Take all the wreckage of bad memories that tried to make me restless and blue. I am so tired and I don't want to cry anymore. I am in a dept of sorrow and in the ocean of loneliness. I feel so alone. But if these things can help me to grow and over come the fear, please make me strong. I can do nothing without you. It's hard to be alone Lord, where no one could hear my sorrow. But I know, you are just there to listen my moaning. Please comfort me with your mercy and love. I could not stand it alone. I need you Jesus.
I know, in this new chapter of my life. There are more things that I could expect with; maybe of joy, or sadness, and or real smile which no fear hiding behind every giggle. Whatever, please prepare me so that I can endure it, until the very day that no more tears to flow because You wipe it. I also know that this fear inside me is a destroying thought. I should not cherish it, but I rather fight it.
In this world, I didn't find any person that I could share my fear and pain. For if I do sharing it, some would be hurt. And these very hard for me. However, having you God in my life is the most precious truth that made me smile in the midst of doubts and tears. You are my oasis of peace, love and confidence. I trust in you. I give my life to you. Whatever your purpose in my life, here I am Lord. I love you so much, and please help me to obey and trust to only you. Amen
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